I've Been Spotlighted!

My dear friend Marie is majoring in photography, so a couple weeks ago, my friend Bean and I decided to help her with her homework. 

It's the real me, y'all.   

"I'm going to be the prettiest girl at the ball!!"

See the rest of Marie's handiwork HERE.

I've Loved This Boy...

for four years. 

Don't worry. He doesn't know.

This love is what I like to call an SBE

(Silent But Everlasting)

It started my sophomore year when I finally started to love Aggie basketball, and then, in my junior year, he picked the seat next to me for an entire semester of political science. If the tall, shy, dark hair, and blue eyes combination wasn't lethal enough, he's a gentleman to boot. Words cannot possibly illustrate the celebrity crush I have on Matt Formisano. Especially since he's not a celebrity. It's kind of like the crush I have on Prince Eric.

One time, I had a conversation with him in class when we were both standing up, and afterwards, I walked away with a crick in the neck. That's what happens when you're five-two and he's six-eight.

Hehehe. You get to hear my voice for the first time, I think. 

Guh-ross!

Like the pathetic fangirl I am, I wanted a picture with him after storming the court, but I was too embarrassed to go up to him and ask. He was signing little kids' basketballs and T-shirts and being noble and stuff.

I know. I'm a coward.

If Wednesday Had Been Like Tuesday...

it would've been awesome. Because on Tuesday, I watched Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion with my old roommate, Abbie, then I spent the afternoon with Jake and Alex at Texas Roadhouse, and, after that, I went ice-skating with Alex. Best Tuesday ever.

But Wednesday wasn't Tuesday. It was pretty good though.

My buddy Garrett asked me to go to a Baxter Black show with him up in Preston, ID which is about a forty-minute drive from where I live. I had to Google him. He's a cowboy poet. Who even knew?

We headed to Preston High School because it was a show put on by the FFA (Future Farmers of America). This organization is HUGE there. Huge. I got inside and realized with delight that I had just walked into the real-life set of Napoleon Dynamite.

Oh yeah. Totes the same auditorium!!

I should mention that I have also been to Pop 'N Pins. My roommates, some friends, and I drove to Preston two years ago to bowl there JUST because of the movie. Hahaha!

Oh yeah. Totes the same bowling alley!!

Anyway, back to the auditorium.

Yes. He really is that tall.

Garrett: Mr. Black, could I get a picture with you?
Baxter Black: Only if I can find a bucket to stand on.

That Mr. Black was an utter charmer when he greeted me. He was just lovely. I was almost smitten. Despite the fact that his mouth was completely hidden by that horrendous mustache. During the show he had to blow it out of the way with a puff of air so he could drink out of his water bottle. Please enjoy one of the last poems he performed that night:

After the show, I had to use the restroom, and, while I'm seated on the can, what should meet me at eye-level but the best bit of advertising I have ever seen?

And then, of course, I needed a picture of myself in the hallway:

That's not me.

Oh yeah. Totes the same lockers!!

Then we went back to Logan and straight to dancing, and it all went downhill from there. See, if you're a member of the country swing club and you're one of the first 75 there, then you get in free. We didn't get there in time for that, but Garrett, who gets in free anyway because he is in the club presidency, flashes his ID and... leaves me behind to pay for myself! I shrugged it off, because I'm nice like that.

Dancing was fine, but around midnight, I realized that Garrett was missing. I asked Sophia (Clark's girlfriend) where he was, and she said that he had left the same time as the girl he's been having drama with. I knew all about that, because these boys tell me everything, but I was shocked he hadn't at least said something to me. "Did he LEAVE you?" she exclaimed. I found Adam, Garrett's roommate, and asked him where Garrett had gone, and he couldn't see him anywhere, and he bellowed, "What the hell?! Did he leave you? You were basically on a date!!"

That's Adam. 400 pounds of awesome. 

And that's me. A few pounds less of awesome.

Sophia shrieked, "A date?"

"Sorta. Not really. A friend-date?"

"Whatever! Text him right now, that jerk!" 

Just as I started typing, Garrett called me, "Uh...so I got in the car and realized I was missing someone. Do you want me to come get you, or do you want to stay longer?" Adam was making slashing motions across his throat, telling me he would take me home, so I just told Garrett that I'd catch a ride home. I was laughing it off, pretending it was funny, but after I hung up, I got so angry and annoyed.

There is no romantic interest between us whatsoever, but I can't believe it. I'd never forget somebody I brought! Even if I was feeling awkward and wanted to leave because of somebody else, I'd at least find my sorta-date and ask if he wanted to leave, and if he wanted to stay, I'd do him the decency of finding him a ride home. Not to mention I would've paid for him to get in, especially when it was my fault he couldn't get there early in the first place!

Adam was so riled up on my behalf, he told me he'd finish the date that Garrett didn't, and that we were going out for ice-cream afterwards. Course, the only place that was open at one in the morning was McDonald's, but he bought us got vanilla cones and some fries, and then we sat in his car outside my house eating them and talking for another hour. He was telling me about this girl he wants to ask out, and then immediately apologized for talking about other girls on our "date." I told him this was a friend-date, and of course, we must discuss the boys and girls we are interested in!

"So Chess, are there any guys in your life?" 

"A ton." It's true. When I'm not at my apartment, I'm at Clark, Garrett, Adam, and Andy's apartment. If I'm not with them, I'm with Jake and Alex and their roommates at their house. Or I'm with all of those boys at church. But no romantic prospects. So Adam and I just kept talking about him. Haha. He walked me to my door, gave me a hug, and made sure I got inside after promising me he'd have some choice words for his roommate in the morning.

Garrett told me the next morning that he called me "because I remembered. I was just outside!" I don't believe him. He was gone way too long for him to be just outside. He forgot me. And I told him so. He asked me if Adam had told me to say that. I told him that I was perfectly capable of figuring that out myself. Urgh. I'm sure I'll be over it by Monday.

The moral of Wednesday night: Friend dates can be awesome. Some friends can be crappy. Others can be fantastic. Keep the fantastic ones! And tell the crappy ones off.

Going on a Date...

Sorta. It's a friend date with my buddy, Garrett.

We're gonna go see a cowboy poet. You'd better believe that Garrett is gonna be wearing all of his cowboy gear. Cowboy hat, belt buckle (I hope it's the pistol lighter), and vest. Maybe I'll get a picture of us.

Hahahaha. I didn't even know there was cowboy poetry. This should be innnnnteresting.

Boys Will Be Girls...

If y'all haven't seen these, please remedy that immediately. 

IMMEDIATELY.

Watch the first and third ones if you do nothing else.

This second one is not anywhere near as funny,

but if you want to... you might as well watch:

ENJOY.

No Matter How Hard You Try...

You'll never be able to beat this face:

Nope. I dare you to try.

Happy Presidents' Day Weekend!!!

So NOT 55 Degrees...

Six inches of snow in about two and a half hours last night. The world looks like a snowy postcard.

Sigh.

It's Utah. This kind of thing is to be expected.

55 Degrees...

Sunny and clear...

And I'm in shorts and a T-shirt.

Jealous? I thought so.

Ahhh... LOVE.

This Valentine's weekend was full of it.

"Autumn, it's Aunt Chessie!!"

She loves me.

Obviously.

Some Valentines for You...

I wrote this poem in a comment on Emmy's blog (and I also dedicate it to Jason):

Roses are red,

Violets are blue.

If you were a Pokemon,

I'd choose YOU!!

Feel free to use that on the nerd or nerdette of your choosing.

Also, 

It Walked on My Pillow

has some fantastic homemade Valentines

you can print out for FREE.

Like this one (it's my favorite):

Click on the image to see more Valentines

Rip It...

I had to climb a fence last night. The ONE pair of jeans that I took home decided they wanted to retire that very second.

They caught. And well... I ripped 'em... ripped 'em REAL GOOD.

What to Blog?

Why don't you tell me?

We could have a vote... I could have a poll thingy on the sidebar. How about you tell me what topics I could blog about and then I'll put them up in a poll... then you can vote, and then I'll write about it...

Like, you could say, "Chess, I nominate that you should write about how you were born in Taiwan but ended up here, but you don't speak Chinese, but Spanish is your second language."

or

"Chess, why don't you show us pictures of you back in high school so we can appreciate the fact that you're slightly better-looking now?"

or we could try out a sample for my old idea of a slightly satirical advice blog called Pester Chester (I'm still toying with the idea of creating it)...

"Dear Chess, I'm going to the gym today, and I can't decide how to do my hair: straight and down, or a perfectly curled up-do. What do you think? Love, Fat and Frizzled."

Since finishing The Poisonwood Bible, about the Congo's fight for independence from Belgium, I have been inspired to write my next post according to the voice of the Groupies. This is not to say that I'm the equivalent of Belgium. Or that I'm a dictator put into power by a CIA coup. I'm just a blogger who gets the occasional writer's block...

So...

Leave your nomination for a topic in the comments!

For Realsies...

James Marsden's younger doppelganger is at the basketball game!

When Confronted with a Supper...

of cheesy broccoli soup, seven-layer bean dip, and cream-cheese swirled pumpkin bread, don't be alarmed by the oddly mismatched items...

Instead...

"Think of this meal as an interracial marriage: You wouldn't expect it at first, and sometimes people look upon the union with suspicion and disapproval, but... then it all comes together and makes beautiful babies."

This wholly spontaneous, no offense intended, totally original Chessie quote is brought to you by a weekend of watching Tangled, The King's Speech, and reading Cormac McCarthy's The Road.

Please show your support for 

Chester the Best-er 

by leaving your most wittiest (deliberate double superlative) comment

on this,

the 400th post!!!

Be Prepared for ANYTHING...

when a guy says, "Hey, I have a question for you..."

I'm not kidding. Because questions like this will come up at one point or another in your life:

"So, like, when it's cold and girls get r.t., does it hurt?"

At this point, your jaw will probably drop, and you'll yelp, "What?!? NO!"

"But this guy said..."

Which is where you must quickly interject, "Does it hurt you?" And he'll be pensive and go, "Nooo..."

And you'll say, "Well, there you go." After which you'll shake your head and say in wonder, "Clark, I never expected that particular question..."

"And THAT'S how comfortable I am with you!"

Boys Are Not Impressed...

when you eat four pieces of pizza. Even when four pieces of pizza is HALF a pizza.

HALF of a Papa John's LARGE SUPREME pizza.

Apparently, you're still a wimp.

What's a girl gotta do to get some respect around here??