BIRTHDAY.

I'm always reading that blogs should have pictures. This blog is bad at it.

Sorry.

I always mean to take them, but see... if you're taking pictures, you are NOT in the middle of the action, and frankly, that's where I like to be.

Especially at my own birthday.

Wait. I did take one picture. Here are the unbaked cupcakes I made.

Oh yeah. Got my hair did.

Played with Niecey.

Long story short.

On Wednesday, I got asked for my number by a guy who wants to take me Latin dancing. Haven't heard from him. On Thursday I cashed in on my free crepes. On Friday we had a party. My besties came up from Springville and Provo, and my boys came down from Salt Lake. We ate, danced a little bit, I was made fun of as per usual...

"So how are you adjusting to life in America?"

"Your American accent is coming along so great, Chess!"

"Don't come sit next to me! You've sat next to everybody! It doesn't MEAN anything anymore!"

And sorry. No pictures. I forgot. It's too bad. I likes the action and taking pictures too often means standing on the outside looking in. Nope. I'd rather have the memories.

But yesterday, on Sunday, my actual birthday, I got to read the letter I wrote to myself ten years ago when I turned fourteen. Yeesh. That girl had so many expectations for me. It's simultaneously gratifying and humiliating. And hilarious.

I am happy to say that I have a college degree. I have pierced ears and contacts. I am not fat. I can answer "Negatory" to her blunt query "Are you still a zit-face? Please, no!" I am not married with children, thank goodness. I'm even more blessed that I'm not with my eighth-grade crush. However, I hung my head in shame when she asked me what kind of car I have. (Read: I. Don't. Have. One.)

But all vanity and self-esteem aside, that little 14-year-old baby girl was wise. She asked me to be the same. To not to forget my standards and values. She told me to be thankful. She told me to remember my goals. To remember my friends. To marry a man who has the same standards and values I have. To make sure that my future daughter has a sister.

To laugh every day.

And then she told me in capital letters to remember how I broke into James Belliston's locker and dumped Cheetos all over the bottom of it.

Good girl.

Groupies, I need your help, stat!! (Updated)

My friend Derek is up for a Bachelorette-type show hosted by Fotofly on Facebook. He is pretty much one of the funniest people I know, so he would probably be the only reason I would EVER watch something like that.

Here is a sample of his hilarity:

Those of you with Facebook accounts, please click on the photo below--it will take you to the actual voting photo.  Login and "Like" it!! This needs to be done by Wednesday night. Share it with everybody you know!!!

Thanks!!

I made a mistake,

you can vote until tonight!

Thanks again! :)

Facebook Friday: I'm in the band.

Lancelot titled this series "Logan on a Wednesday."

 

I love my friends.

ESPECIALLY KATE!!!

Facebook Friday: Llama.

I don't care what anyone says. If Facebook is the means to spread joy like this around, then so be it. It is God's social network.

So Kristy (at work) and I decided we need to make this ourselves since suits such as these are ridiculously expensive.

I'm thinking two sets of tan sweats and a furry blanket. And a spare llama head. Anyone got one lying around?

What other supplies would I need here? 

Other than moon boots?

Also, this endeavor needs some great two-person choreography and theme music. Suggestions?

Birth Month Miracle #2.

If you missed Miracle #1, you can read about it HERE.

But here goes Miracle #2...

About two weeks ago, I got my very first one of these:

Oops.

I called in to pay it, but the citation number wasn't anywhere in their system, so they told me not to worry about it. 

Booyah!

Also, I must point out the brown spot is due to my stuffing my face with Nutella and graham crackers while talking to the lady at the justice court. Therefore, I can only assume that Nutella is a very lucky substance on which to be snacking while addressing parking violations.

I'm telling you. Birth Month is a magical thing. Respect it and it will take care of you.

Mis queridos muchachos.

Dear S., 
I used to really like working with you. Now, you are the worst.

Love,
the better closer

My man, Jim,
Glad we could pace each other during that race. Keep running!

Love,
I-could've-beat-you-to-the-finish-line-were-it-not-for-my-stupid-shoelace

Dear Ryan-at-IHOP,
Yes, the first few days of serving are the worst, but you were lucky to have me for a customer. Don't be so scared. Most people are very understanding. :-)

A fellow server

Dear Brentacle,
On the unlikely day I win at Words with Friends, well, you owe me something awesome. Like glory. Not Yu-gi-oh glory. The real kind. Like twenty bucks.

Speedy Snarks

Dear YSB,
You kinda made it seem like something might happen, but nothing has, and I keep hearing things that are making me sad. I'm done.

G'bye,
YSG

Dear Noble and Lancelot,
So excited to rip Breaking Dawn Pt. 1 to shreds with you guys. It's been too long since we destroyed Eclipse.

Twilightfully yours,
Chess

Dear Bank Boy,
You still be cute. I know you gots a girl on a mish, but we should hang out. Maybe you could come to my birthday party?

Appreciative Customer

Rango, gypsies, and a race.

Remember that one photoshoot I did last summer?

Well, I did another one with those fun people. Except this time we dressed up as gypsies. But I don't have a picture of that yet. Still waiting.

Watched Rango with my new buddy Lara. So weird and funny. So was Rango. (Jk, Lara, jk.)

Then I ran a race on Saturday. Read about it HERE.

But here is a preview of the race:

Facebook Friday: Asian

BIIIIIIIIRTH MOOOOOOONTH!!!!!

Clearly, I have not been my usual blogging self.

Otherwise, I would've announced in March that Birth Month was approaching. On April first, I would had announced that Birth Month had officially begun. I would've started planning my birthday party right then, instead of leaving it until four this morning.

What do you think of a game called "Pin the peace sign on the Asian"?

Because at 4:15 this morning, it sounded pretty awesome. So did a carrot cake with maple-cream-cheese frosting, jalapeno popper stuffed pretzels, and my own cupcakes (which reportedly taste like a Snickers, although they contain not a whit of that candy bar).

Just sayin'.

I'm already nervous about trying to get people to come to this since I'm not up in Logan anymore. But that's what Facebook is for!!! A mass invitation two and a half weeks in advance! YAY!

Look what HAPPENED to me. It's a Birth Month miracle!!!

But first on my activity list for Birth Month is dinner with a friend tonight. A gypsy photo shoot tomorrow. Then a 10-mile race on Saturday. Maybe I will make a t-shirt that blares "BIRTH MONTH" to everybody. Just so no one is confused.

What else should happen at my birthday shindig?

How should I decorate?

What should we do?