TMI. Way sorry. Not really.

So, sometimes I forget to take my towel to the bathroom when I shower. Also, there are lots of people that live in this house. Both genders. Not all are related to me.

Do I let this stop me from running topless down the hall to my bedroom to retrieve my towel? Or bottomless, for that matter?

No.

I do not.

Because it is just not worth it to put all your clothes back on, just to get a measly piece of terrycloth.

(It's worth it to lock the door behind you though, I'll tell you that, because having a male renter walk in on you while you're sittin' on the can is kinda embarrassing, but that's another story.)

This doesn't usually happen...

but I had crazy bad insomnia last night. And for the last couple of days too. It's because I have an unfamiliar room (even though it was mine in high school), a totally different bed, the lighting outside is too bright sometimes, I'm trying to get on a decent sleeping schedule, and according to Wikipedia, if I drink too much during the day or right before bed, that doesn't help either.

Well, sheesh. Trying to drink more and sleep better means worse sleep or none at all.

No sleep doesn't work when I have to babysit for three and a half hours starting at seven-thirty in the morning. And this is a very energetic baby who has just learned to crawl, I might add. I'm just the aunt. I don't have the mom muscles or energy.  Also, I have quasi-panic attacks when drool and poop enter the scene.

But she's asleep in her morning nap now. And I am thinking in a whisper. Typing in a whisper. Tip-toeing in a whisper.

Also, I'm going to die. Of a headache. And a stomachache. And general exhaustion.

Please say nice things at my funeral.

On the plus side--I wrote two long letters yesterday, and am planning to write a couple more today. Only if I don't die, of course. Which I'm going to.

Today is a letter-writing day!

It's the kind of slow, aimless, hot day where I pull out my personalized stationary and pens and stickers and envelopes and I write letters. And it's kind of great, because we use my grandpa's old stamps--stern-looking men in long grumpy mustaches--and so to get the correct postage, you pretty much have to cover the entire envelope because each stamp doesn't add up to much. (Don't worry, we're using the worthless ones!)

So maybe you will be one to get a letter in a few days! A letter whose stern, mustachioed exterior will be undercut by the cheerful words within. I love using the word "undercut." Makes me feel all English-majory, you know? Especially since I'm all nostalgic now that my friends are going back to school. Sigh.

Anywayz. All I wanted to ask was if you want to be on my letter-writing list for future letter-writing days? If you do, feel free to email me your street address. Only if you trust me and are comfortable doing that, though!!

Have a lovely Tuesday and first week of school to everybody!

Cheese Lover

Cheesy things I love:

found via Google image search

• Painting my nails -- latest love is Shatter or Crackle nail polish (see pic for example)
• Glee
• Glee 3D Concert movie
• DCOMs (Disney Channel Original Movies) -- latest love is Lemonade Mouth
• Lemonade Mouth soundtrack
• Disney movies
• Chick flicks
• 80s movies -- latest loves are Girls Just Wanna Fun and Can't Buy Me Love
• Millionaire Matchmaker on Bravo

Yep. No shame here!

Sad Things

I know it's Friday and that it should be a happy day, but lots of sad things have happened--

I left Logan in tears. I left my dear roommate and friends behind.  I got eliminated from Blogger Idol this morning. My ankle is bothering me. And now I have to unpack everything. Which is the worst cut of all.

So... I don't know what to say.

Um...  Good luck on the new school year for all you students!!! I wish I were joining you.

Blogger Idol!!

Guys, I am in the Top Four. This is so close to being over. I promise. I just need you for the next three weeks. Please, please stay with me. You are so awesome!

This week, I'm writing about a little family tradition.

To find out what it is and to watch me demonstrate it (this marks my online singing debut--which is way embarrassing for me), head on over to Blogger Idol, read my post, and vote for me into the Top Three!!!

WINNNNNERZZZZ!!!

Woot, woot!!! This giveaway is now closed and I am here to announce the winners! As for those who didn't win, thank you, thank you for entering and hopefully, there will be more giveaways in the future.

Let me remind you again of the prizes:

• First place will get a calendar, a t-shirt, and some bookmarks
• Second place will get a t-shirt
• Third place will get a calendar
• Fourth and fifth place will both get an assortment of bookmarks

Without any further delay...

First place and the grand prize goes to my darling former roomie, Erin!

Second place with a T-shirt belongs to my AZ soulmate, Amy! (Haha.)

Kayce, making being an English bearable for me and others, is in third! 

Back from her mission in fourth place is my buddy, Sarah,

And last, but certainly not least, 

the coolest Relief Society President I ever had in Orem,

Lindsaaaaaay!!

Congratulations to the winners! Please email me at chessbess{at}gmail{dot}com to claim your prizes and to give me your mailing addresses (do NOT leave them in a comment). Erin and Amy, please confirm what phrase you would like on your T-shirts. 

Things you should know...

In case you didn't know them already. I don't think you do, which is why I'm telling you:

• I watched the last fifteen minutes of a really stupid movie called Mega Shark vs. Crocosaurus the other night. I'm still embarrassed about it.
• I made a birthday cake and candle out of construction paper and I'm going to record myself singing a birthday song for somebody. I'm embarrassed in advance. More on that later. 
• I just woke up from a two hour nap. What am I, a teenager?
• I am avoiding packing up my stuff to go home. 
• There are a lot of clothes I just need to get rid of. 
• I wore leopard print high heels to church yesterday.
• I finished watching the last episode of Arrested Development on Saturday night. My friend and I rewatched the entire series this summer. Which means we stretched it out a lot, considering I watched the entire series last summer in less than two weeks. 
• My ringtone is now "It's Not Easy Bein' White." If you know, you understand. I will not explain myself on this one.  
• I have a black graduation cap and gown (for short people) that I would be happy to sell at a discounted price. Interested? Email me.
• You have the rest of today and tomorrow to enter my GIVEAWAYYYYYY! Do it, you have a pretty good chance of winning something, as not a huge number of people have entered. :)

Mega Shark vs. Crocosaurus

Yes. That is a real movie. It's on the SyFy channel.

I'm so embarrassed. But in my defense, I'm surfing the channels and it's the end of it and....

WAIT FOR IT...

Steve Urkel is in it. 

"My God. I think they're hatching."

There's no turning back now.

I'm so sad. Like a sad little panda.

I'm leaving Kate and Logan this week. Probably for good. My family needs me, my friends are nearly non-existent, and I haven't been able to find a job up here, so I am conceding defeat.

This has been my home for the last five years. Such a big part of my heart belongs to this sweet little place. I have cried at least five times a day the last four days. It is not what I want to do. But it's the right thing to do. I can't wait for the day when the right thing to do matches with what I want to do.

Ugh. I'm heartbroken.

So Audrey Hepburn was WRONG.

At least in Wait Until Dark she was.

Even if you think you know your house well enough to navigate it in the dark, 

you probably don't.

If, in the future, for whatever reason, I happen to intercept a creepy doll that is the smuggling container for highly illegal drugs, and the drug lord comes to claim it as his own, and it's the dead of night, and I have to run away with all the lights off, I probably won't get away. Because I will overshoot the doorway that's on my left, and run straight into the doorjamb, and hit my head, and fall against the kitchen counter.

At least, that's what happens when I go to the bathroom in the middle of the night. I don't see how it could be any different if a drug lord came to claim a creepy doll with drugs sewed into her stomach.

That being said, go vote for me at Blogger Idol!!!! 

Aiming for the Top Four!

(Voting begins right now and goes for 36 hours until midnight on Thursday CST)

Or you can enter my giveaway HERE.

Don't judge me

When I logged into my Blogger Dashboard this morning, Google told me, "It looks like your blog is popular and many popular blogs make money with AdSense. Try it now!'

And I think I will. I'm gonna try selling out for a little while!  Like I said, don't judge me.

I've been stretching a pan of brownies over the last WEEK because I can't afford to buy groceries. And you guys don't even know, I'm soooo hungry. And I'm getting fat because the only thing I have to eat in the cupboard is sugar.

If it doesn't work and is, like totally lame, I shall take them down immediately. If it means I get to buy some fruit and vegetables, well, righteous! (Because I refuse to steal food and then get locked up for nineteen years.)

So I hiked Squaw Peak...

Kate and I hung out with the boizzzz two Saturdays ago. We went to my hometown because our friends invited us to go on the annual Squaw Peak hike. I'm really glad she came with me, because if she hadn't, true to fashion, I would've been the one female swimming in a sea of snarky testosterone. And worse than that, the sole person at the back of the line. 

We may have been horribly out of shape for that four mile plus a 3100+ foot gain hike. We may have been behind those boys by fifteen minutes. And they may or may not have thought that we'd never make it, but baby, we prevailed.

Despite that victory, mostly, I just wanted to say that I was wearing a t-shirt that said "True Aggies Bleed Blue" and one doofwad BYU hiker coming down shouted at me, "I bleed blue too, but it's the right blue." 

Don't you worry. I put that jerk in his place with an extremely rude gesture.

That's right, folks. I blew a raspberry at him over my shoulder.

(Don't forget to enter my giveaway HERE. 

Make sure you leave a separate comment for each entry option.)

500 Posts and a Giveaway!!!

(This giveaway is now closed.)

Come one, come all!!!

This marks my 500th post on my dear little blog. Chester the Best-er also celebrated its third birthday in May. Yay!!!

Thanks to all of you wonderful readers--those of you who comment, those of you who email, those of you who lurk, those of you who have voted for me on Blogger Idol (I'm in the Top 5 now!)--you are they who make this little corner of mine in cyberspace so special. 

And that is why I want to do something special for you. 

My very first giveaway!! I've wanted to do one for a long time, but I'm dorky and I can't think of how to do things like that, but my dear friend Marie is helping me. She likes photography and graphic design, so she is designing some cool beans things for YOU, featuring some of Chester the Best-er's more memorable moments.

Like some bookmarks, calendars, and T-shirts (tentative examples of WIP designs below):

 

The calendar will be the size of a CD jewel case.

Five winners will be drawn: 

• First place will get a calendar, a t-shirt, and a bookmark
• Second place will get a t-shirt
• Third place will get a calendar
• Fourth and fifth place will both get bookmarks
• All winners will get to choose the designs on their prizes. 

How to win:

Required entry: Leave a comment on this blog telling me which design you like best or your favorite quote from this blog.

Extra entries:

Each additional item will increase your chances of winning. You can do any or all of these for up to six entries. If you already do these, they count, but you MUST leave a separate comment for each item, or they will only count as one entry.

1. Visit Marie's travel blog Rie Around the World. Come back here and leave a comment suggesting where she should go next.
2. Join Marie Teemant Photography on Facebook.
3. Join Chester the Best-er on Facebook (or see right sidebar).
4. Follow my blog OR subscribe to its email updates (see right sidebar). Once you subscribe, you will receive an email confirming your subscription.
5. Follow @chessthebess on Twitter and tweet the following statement, then come back to this post telling me you tweeted. 

I just entered to win a #giveaway from @chessthebess! Enter here: goo.gl/fb/cM00Y

Important:
- This giveaway is open to all and will run until Tuesday, August 23rd at 11:59 pm MST.
- Winners will be generated randomly via Random.Org and will be announced on this blog on Wednesday, August 24th at 9:00 am MST.
- Winners will have until Friday, August 26th at 11:59 pm MST to claim their prizes or new winners will be chosen.

Good luck!!
(Personally, I'd really want a tee that says "I ♥ Yummy Smelling Boys")

Top 6 Voting!!!

My darlings, I have made the Top 6 of Blogger Idol!! This means that no matter where I place after this, I gets me a prize. I am aiming for that gosh darn grand prize, and I desperately need your help to do climb the rankings and take it home! This week's entry is fun as Chess got to do what Chess does best--which is tell a good story. So, it's honestly in your best interest if you....

Click HERE and vote for me!

(Voting starts right now and will remain open until midnight CST on Thursday)

Also, my next post will be my 500th entry on this dear little blog, and in celebration of that fact (and to thank you for all the support over the last few years, and especially over the last few weeks)--I am going to find a way to do my first giveaway, and it will be good. So, stay tuned for details on how to enter! (Because I haven't figured that out--and also, I am poor.)

It's very reassuring when

you wake up one day and realize that if you ever have a family, they won't starve.

Guys, I'm not such a bad cook after all!! I made a creamed potatoes and peas/cheesy broccoli soup.

FROM SCRATCH. 

All of it.

I did not use a recipe. 

And it was delicious.

And it still is delicious two days later, 

because I am still eating it. Help!

Vote for this baby's aunt:

Because she would vote for me HERE if she could.

In case, you weren't sure if...

....you should vote for me, starting right now HERE at Blogger Idol... (until midnight CST)...

then please read these testimonials to help you decide, once and for all, that I should win:

Coco:

See which skill he is talking about HERE.

And watch this. This will get you if nothing else will.

Now vote!
VOTE, VOTE!!
Right HERE.

For Jake, aka Ice Blue.

Because he stalked my blog, and then told me he stopped reading, because he "lost interest when I realized I wasn't mentioned." The absurdity. This blog is over three years old and nearly 500 posts long. If you're in my life, you're probably somewhere in here too. My pride is enough that I will NOT be accused of neglect.

To prove my point, here are some posts that mention Jake (directly or indirectly):

• HERE
• HERE
• and, oh, HERE

and one more time:

So there, Jacob. 

Of course, at the end of the picture, it's all about me.

Which is what this blog is all about.

Me.