My contacts got recalled...

So I wonder if I returned faulty contacts...

OR

I gave up top-secret super powers that I was not supposed to have.

Somehow, all my issues lead back to the Power Rangers.

Like my nerd bone.

I have a nerd bone, guys. It's like a funny bone, but way more sensitive.

Sometimes I get crushes on boys. Mostly because they're cute. So I grin goofily at them because they don't know I think they're cute, and one day, they'll show up wearing glasses cos they lost their contacts, or it's allergy season, or they woke up late and their hair is all messy, and my nerd bone will go ping! Suddenly, they look all cute AND smart, which makes me go numb from head to toe on my left side.

Or is that a heart attack?

Maybe my heart IS my nerd bone.

I can only conclude that it is all Billy the Blue Power Ranger's fault.

Do you have an "[insert noun/adjective]" bone?

Next up: my issues with the color pink, playing an Asian, and long hair on boys.

I have achieved the impossible....TWICE.

Remember how I woke up with perfect hair this summer?

I did it again this morning!!! I am better than a movie star, for I am a real human being who woke up with perfect hair.

(It's pretty much the only thing I could put on a resume at this point in my life.)

And the WINNER of the TrendyXchange gift card is...

I would like you to know that the system I used to select the winner was highly sophisticated.

 Step One: Write each of your names on my blank Golden Corral cards.

Step Two: Fold them in little airplanes.

 

Step Three: Take off my glasses so I can't tell which plane is whose and chuck them at Maggie Gyllenhaal's "Got Milk" poster that I found while looking for recipes in a Family Circle magazine.

Step Four: See which plane made it the closest.

 

Step Five: Put glasses back on to see who won!

Congratulations, Nina!! Maggie and I are so happy for you!! :) 

You have until Tuesday morning (Nov 22) to email me at chessbess{at}gmail{dot}com to claim your prize. Otherwise, a new winner will be picked!

TrendyXchange GIVEAWAY!!!!!!

So guess what??!!

I have another giveaway--of a prize that is ready to go. I want to explain to the winners of the last giveaway that they can blame THIS GIRL for not having their prizes yet. I have gotten after her time and again, but she is just so busy busy. I haven't even gotten my cool t-shirt yet. Trust me, I haven't forgotten about you.

Anyway, about this giveaway. A few weeks after I moved back home, I was meeting my friends for a birthday dinner in Provo at a pizza place I had never been to previously.

I got there early, so I  decided I would kill time and browse "that cute clothing store over there." When I got inside, unfortunately, the store was not open for selling, they were only buying clothes to build up their inventory. I talked to the manager and owner, Kalie, who explained the concept of the store to me--they buy your new or gently used brand name clothing (women's and men's) and give you 30-40% of their selling price, with the options of cash on the spot or in-store credit.

Even though I was bummed I couldn't buy yet, I was blown away by the adorable, welcoming design, the bright colors, and the nice clothes--they have a great selection of new items along with the used.

But then I got a brilliant idea, mostly because I was very poor. I said coyly, "So, your grand opening's not for a month...are you hiring?" One week later, I was behind the counter. And I love it. So even though I work there, my opinion of this store is completely honest and mine. It's a great concept, a wonderful store, and the staff is fantastic. We try our best.

So this week, Kalie has generously contributed a $25 Gift Card for one of you to use at the store!!! Hers is the first and (currently) only location, so the winner should live somewhere between Spanish Fork and Point of the Mountain! (Or at least be a frequent visitor.) Word, Utah County-ers, this one's for you!

All you have to do is "like" trendyXchange's Facebook page and tell them that Chester the Best-er sent you! Come back here and leave me a comment telling me you did so. This is required.

You have the chance for three extra entries for a total of four entries and you MUST leave a separate comment for each:

• Become a follower of this blog or subscribe by email (see handy widgets at top right)
• "Like" Chester the Best-er on Facebook (or see handy widget at top right)
• Link to this blog post on Facebook so your friends (male or female) can enter too. 

Contest is open to those in Utah County or those who visit often! Spread it like wildfire! You can enter until 11:59 pm on Sunday, November 20, 2011. Winner will be announced Monday morning! 

I made out with one of the cooks

in my dream last night.

Is it because I hate no-shave November? Because he had some scruff. But that's the least of the problems with this dream.

First, I've never made out with anyone. How do I know I was doing it right? More importantly, am I even cute enough to be worth making out with? (Yeesh, how many prepositions did I just dangle?)

Second. He was no cook I've ever seen at work. I know this because he was good-lookin'.

Third. If he was a cook, then why didn't he bring me a takeout box?!!!

Last night was Military Appreciation Day at Golden Corral.

I was eating before my shift, before all the veterans and soldiers came in with their families to enjoy a meal on the house (just the veterans and the soldiers--cos we don't care if the families eat or not--jokes!), and I noticed that the orange chicken was pleasantly non-spicy, unlike before, when it was so encrusted with crushed red pepper that it was almost impossible to swallow.

I pointed this out to my manager, saying, "Can I just say this is so much better than it used to be?"

And he said, "Of course you can say that, it's a free country!"

I exclaimed loudly, "It IS. All of these people have fought for my right to say that the pseudo Chinese orange chicken is now palatable! I APPRECIATE them."

Aren't I just so patriotic? :)

So I talked to my chin this morning,

And I said,

"Why the [bleeeeeeeep] are you breaking out like it's 2002 and you're drinking a frozen CapriSun after PE?!!!!!!!!!"

Dear Mr. Chester,

It's 11/11/11. I kind of wish I were marrying you today.

Because at 11:11 pm, I would tell you that, despite it being the most powerful wish day ever, I wouldn't need to make a wish tonight, because I already had you.

Love,
Chess

The Life Story -- Fred and Trudy: Part III (1/2)

The Life Story -- Fred and Trudy: Part III

So Fred and Trudy finally got their act together and were married on March 22, 1985 in the Salt Lake Temple in Salt Lake City, Utah. Family and friends were present, including Julie, the woman who served a mission and taught Trudy the Gospel.

But the ceremony didn't happen right away. No one knew why there was a wait, but then a temple worker came in and said, "We're sorry for the delay. The temple president, Elder Hanks, has requested to do this sealing, and he will be a few more minutes. Do you mind waiting?" But of course not!!

The mystery, though! The questions! Why would Marion D. Hanks of the Seventy specifically request to perform their sealing? (Among the workers: Who are Fred and Trudy, anyway?) Like most mysteries, there was an explanation. When Trudy joined the Church, the mission president was Doug Powelson and Elder Hanks was president of the Asia Area. At the time, President Powelson had told Elder Hanks about the American who had joined the Church in Taiwan (which, if you haven't figured it out, is quite unusual--then again this family never did anything the usual way, as you'll soon discover).

Today, however, Pres. Powelson said to Pres. Hanks, "Remember that girl I told you about who joined the Church in Taiwan? She's getting married here," and Pres. Hanks replied, "Well then, I want to perform the sealing."

Done and done.

Trudy was very proud when all was said and done and she hadn't shed a tear. She was pretty caught up in the dress, all the attention, and the general commotion, but then she saw Julie, her missionary. She saw all the changes that had happened, and the different path she had been led to because Julie had decided to serve a mission and teach Trudy the gospel, and well, there was much tearing up.

But they were tears of joy, and then it was time to party!