Squaw Peak 2012

I got squawed again.

And so much more quickly than the last time. Pretty much in near-rockin' shape so I got my booty to the top of the mountain in so much less time than last year.

And my beautiful Suzie-friend came along.

So much bromance, so little time.

I thought this would be an adorable picture of me and my handsome friends...

....but my presence is clearly ruining the moment, so this is what is right...

(Squawback Mountain)

And this was not planned, people.

We are just that cool and good-looking.

"These are my people.

This is where I come from."

~ Rodney Atkins ~

An Eclipse. The good kind.

Went with a bunch down to Parowan, Utah to check out the eclipse on Sunday.

We were totally wowed. You can tell by how our jaws are dropping.

And then Lara found a skull. Actually, more like half of one.

And I talked to it.

But then I found out I was actually talking to the back of the skull. I'm an English major, not a scientist.

Obviously.

Lying on my back on the kitchen counter and staring up at the ceiling.

Hi guys.

I know.

Where the blankity-blank have I been? (see post title: it's an unusual place, but considering how I've just been floating around in this crazy space in my head lately, I think it makes perfect sense.)

I have been wanting to say something, anything really, but I have felt so silent on the inside the last few weeks. Despite fun days here and there, I think I have been trying not to fly off the handle and go completely beserk, so I've just dialed everything down and zipped my lips (and apparently my fingers) in an effort to keep it all together.

I feel like there are so many things I want to do. But at the same time, I am completely incapable of doing any of them. I want to quit my current job. I need a grown-up new one. I want to buy a car, but I don't know how to go about it. I want to move. Out of the state, out of the country. But where do I go?

I want to send YSB a cheesy card that tells him how I'm crazy mad about him, but it's not exactly Valentine's Day, and I'm a coward. I want to write my brother a letter and tell him I miss him, and I have, but I just haven't sent it. I want to finish that stupid photo album I've been working on for over three years and send it to my birth family, but I can't seem to find the motivation to finish.

I want to quit SLACKING ON MY MARATHON TRAINING because the race is in THREE WEEKS.

I don't understand myself sometimes. Why am I so afraid to go after the things I want? Why can't I finish even simple little projects? Why do these stupid little things terrify and immobilize me?

I hate that I can never be the best version of me that I want. This complacent, boring person isn't me, but I'm not doing a very good job of changing her.

I have this dream of spending an entire day just being brave, and right now, I can't ever see that coming true.

Oh for Pete's sake, this is the worst post ever. Stay tuned for something much better!

Facebook Friday: Boring Movies and Barack the Belieber.

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See "last year's Chigurh success" below"

Sidenote: Last year's homemade birthday card.

I mean, come on.

Who wouldn't want to be my friend?