I'm growing my eyebrows out.

Good thing I have bangs to cover up that fact.

Guess what's worse than growing  eyebrows.

If you said bangs, then you are probably a woman.

"I'm probably never going to blog again,"

is what I told Marie two nights ago. And I sincerely meant it.

But then I was like, "Wait."

I mean, have I told you about the time I was taking a nap on my couch and I woke up to this amazingly handsome man with Prince Eric's looks and Aaron Tveit's hair who Peter Panned himself through my window and made me kiss him? I had no choice in the matter.

I haven't told you?

Oh man. It's a GREAT story.



Or it would've been if I hadn't woken up. :-/

(Once Upon a Time is ruining my life.)

They say "Follow your heart"

when trying to make a tough decision.

Not I.

I say,

"Follow your uterus!" 

and then I buy ALL the kinds of M&Ms I can find.

Going 5 miles below the speed limit is like...

- Leaving the crust of the pizza

- Not drinking the chocolate milk after eating Cocoa Puffs

- Changing the radio station before the song's over

- Eating the ice-cream, but not the cone

- Not trying to hit impossible notes when you're the only one in the car

- Driving in an empty canyon without using your brights

- Dumping a mostly empty water bottle on the ground instead of on someone

- Asking for no cherry on top

It's like, "So much potential wasted!"

Like, "WHY ARE YOU SAVING THE BEST FOR LAST AND THEN THROWING IT ALL AWAY?"

Drive. The. Speed. Limit.

Girl Talk: Our changing bodies.

When chatting in a group of girls, somehow there's always a bit of the conversation that turns to height, periods, puberty, and boobs. I don't know why, but it does. And it's loud.

Girl 1: "I hate my big boobs!!!"

Girl 2: (patting down her chest) "I can't even find mine!"

Me: (frowning) "The only thing that got bigger with puberty was my hair."

Truth.

Last night I dreamed of destiny:

I dreamed that I was working at a candle shop.

Guess who I worked with at the candle shop?

Zac Efron.

I think I've explained myself.

No pants, no shirt, no problem!

Oh hey guys.

You still there?

I forgot I was still here for a minute. I started grad school. I quit the restaurant (what???). I moved. To Salt Lake! I have a new place, and only ONE roommate! (Need a job, though.)

Do you know what this MEANS? Especially since it's summer???

I go to bed wearing nothing but my undies. And I sleep in. By the time I wake up, my roommate is gone to work, so I don't have to put any clothes on at all, and I walk around in my skivvies, like, all day.

No, I don't think you understand.

ALL. DAY.

I just hope I don't forget myself and step outside to check the mail.